Wel-

come   to:   The   Burnt   Toast   Which   Is   Our   Lives   (TBT

WIOL)!

Hello. I don't know why but you seem to have stumbled across MY homepage and you're probably wondering where the hell your back button is, but if not you're probably confused as to what in the name of Bob this page has to do with Burnt Toast, but if you're not, you're probably my friend Brett. Brett is my co-host and willing accomplice in most if my schemes. Check out a

little info on him here:

'cause in case you didn't know, Brett is cool.You see Brett

and I were two normal guys (hey stop laughing!) Okay, Brett and I were NEVER normal, but we were (and still are) the best of friends. So one snowy summer day (hey we live in Buffalo, NY what do you expect) we were outside (why? I don't know it was his idea) and I was playing my guitar (which got hard after the frostbite caused me to have amputate both hands) and he was playing his drums (which was also hard since his tongue became stuck to the cymbal after a nasty incident with trying to lick frost). Since we obviously were not going to express our creative endeavors through music we started coming up with different band names. We changed some (Severe Toe Pain: STP) and outright stole other ones (Pure Frosting, The Dynamic Duo, Exploding F**k Dolls (note we used to say it with the bleap), and Aerosmith), but soon we were sued and arrested (which was good 'cause the police car was heated) and had to start making up our own names. We went on playing and making up new names for sometime and just as I blacked out from the cold the last thing I heard brett say was: "How about Burnt Toast?" Now it has ocurred to me since then he might have actually been hungry (I told ya we've never been normal) but it didn't matter. We've never actually had a band with this name unless you count the milli-second before I blacked out, but it doesn't matter. It has become a public-access show and a cult classic among our friends (who are good enough to spare our feelings and lie to us about our comic value). More then that though, Burnt Toast has become a part of Brett and my life. Now whenever we do something strange and unusual like get picked up by cops for walking down Main Street at 4am in pajamas (TRUTH I SWEAR) or make a trailer for a movie that never existed about a Hippy Ninja (Can be seen on Burnt Toast III: Expunge the Contraband) or just say something really weird or cool in unison that sounds like it was planned (which is funny cause BT TV was never rehearsed) we will both look at each and say "Tbtwiol" because it is: The Burnt Toast Which Is Our Lives --understand now? I didn't think so. :) Send your questions to me via email:

ME. PLEASE I NEED VALIDATION!!!

Below you can get to know a little about Brett, me, my friends, and stuff that just is a part of the TBTWIOL.

Click on the television to check out stuff about BurntToast The Movies/TV Show the cult classic (yeah right!)

They say you learn
Alot about a man
from the company
he keeps.
Check out some info
On the people I call
friends.

Which Way Does Your Beard Point Tonight Walk Whitman? or

(In Rockey and Bullwinkle Annoucer Voice) Here are a Few of my Favorite Links